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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28798977">Extraordinary You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/heaflower/pseuds/vampwoozi'>vampwoozi (heaflower)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SEVENTEEN (Band), 어쩌다 발견한 하루 | Extraordinary You (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Boo Seungkwan-centric, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sassy Boo Seungkwan, Swearing, Terminal Illnesses, Yoon Jeonghan is a Little Shit, no character death! so dw</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:20:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,647</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28798977</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/heaflower/pseuds/vampwoozi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Seungkwan is a student from a wealthy family who suffers from a lifelong heart condition that inevitably means he won't live past his teenage years. However, when he realizes he's a mere side character in a Korean webtoon, he's determined to meddle with the story that was set out for him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>30</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Prologue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This will somewhat follow the plot line of Extraordinary you (2019) and is therefore inspired by this amazing drama. You can read this without ever having seen it (but I do recommend you do because it's amazing!) and it's different enough for you to enjoy this if you have.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s not every day that a handsome man in his thirties leans over the counter of your school canteen, gives a long-drawn-out sigh as he’s eyeing you up–  your plain school uniform, typical straight fringe, round face and protruding cheek bones– before he calmly explains to you that you’re living in the world of comics.</p><p>And that was exactly why seventeen-year-old Boo Seungkwan gasped dramatically before breaking out in laughter. Sure, his past few days had been weird. There was the frequent loss of time, the blackouts that always occurred when he was sitting in class or hanging out at the cafeteria, and the strange snapping sound that always appeared before he found himself waking up at a new place. But the world of comics?! This sounded like a bad joke.</p><p>“Why are you laughing?” The canteen man– no ugly uniform, no fishnet on hair, instead, a handsome man in his golden years in an elegant suit, wearing his blonde hair in a loose ponytail– snapped at him.</p><p>The man had very comic-like features, Seungkwan admitted. He looked more like the main lead of a webtoon than a canteen worker with his high cheekbones, small face and big eyes. But nothing was regular at Carat High, one of the most prestigious private schools that Seoul had to offer, so Seungkwan had never questioned it.</p><p>“I’m laughing because this is ridiculous.” The only reason why Seungkwan didn’t say <em>you are ridiculous</em> was because of Jeonghan’s authority– not that Seungkwan had an ounce of respect for that man in his body or was scared of the repercussions. It was just the way Seungkwan had been raised. From the day he was born, Seungkwan had been surrounded by private teachers who not only thought him important life skills like how to play the clarinet but also the rules of etiquette.</p><p>Jeonghan snorted. “Believe me or don’t. I told you the truth so please, for the love of god, will you leave me and my kitchen alone now?”</p><p>Seungkwan crossed his arms. He wasn’t going to let this go, possibly ever. “You really want me to believe that I am just a character in a webtoon and that everything around me isn’t real?”</p><p>“I never said that.” Jeonghan turned, grabbing a cooking book, suddenly very busy with looking up a particularly interesting recipe. Seungkwan felt his face heat up. He didn’t like being ignored.</p><p>“You just said–“</p><p>Jeonghan held up his hand, clearly just as frustrated as Seungkwan himself. “I said you live in the world of comics, yes. Whenever you have a black-out, you don’t actually forget everything that happens. That’s just the flip of the page. . . the empty space between the scenes, so to speak. But you?” He pointed his finger at Seungkwan’s chest. “You are real.”</p><p>Seungkwan sucked in his lower lip. For a fleeting moment, he stared at Jeonghan, trying to figure out if he should break the rules of etiquette for once and curse the devilishly handsome man out for making a fool of him.</p><p>“You still don’t get it do you?” Jeonghan sighed, looking up from his cooking book. Seungkwan disliked the look on the man’s face, with his thin eyebrows pulled together like he wasn’t even trying to hide his pity.</p><p>“No,” Seungkwan pouted. “I understand perfectly well. I will talk to the school’s nurse and see what she can do for you.”</p><p>“Seungkwan,” Jeonghan moaned, grabbing his arm before he had to chance to leave the kitchen for good. “Look at me.”</p><p>Still pouting, Seungkwan slowly turned around. He shot Jeonghan the coldest stare he could manage, one that made the cook roll his eyes. “I’m not lying to you, I promise,” he said sternly.</p><p>“It’s still Boo for you,” Seungkwan retorted, nose held high, although his voice had lost a bit of sharpness and his tone was gentler than a moment ago.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You just called me Seungkwan. But we aren’t friends so stick with Boo, will you?”</p><p>Jeonghan let go of him, taking a step back. He mustered Seungkwan for a moment before giving a light-hearted shrug. “Sure, whatever pleases Mr. Diva-Boo.”</p><p>Seungkwan’s features darkened. “Just Boo,” he said. “That’s enough.”</p><p>Jeonghan’s lips perked up and his eyes sparkled. Like this, he looked like an angel sent from heaven just to torture the fuck out of Seungkwan. Just great. “Because you’ve been so nice and sweet, I’ll explain it again for you,” he said. He pulled a book from his coat, one that Seungkwan instantly recognized as a comic book.</p><p>“Is that–“</p><p>Jeonghan held up his hand once more. “Just be patient, we will get there.” He pointed at the abandoned seat at the other side of the counter. Seungkwan didn’t enjoy being ordered around but he desperately wanted to hear what the man had to say so he obeyed– this time. Once he was seated, Jeonghan flipped open the first page of the comic book which depicted two pages of character introduction.</p><p>He pointed at the three people on the first page– two boys and a girl. “These,” Jeonghan explained, “Are the protagonists of this comic.”</p><p>Seungkwan leaned over to see better. He squinted at the drawings, trying to figure out why these people looked so damn familiar. “Wait. That’s. . .”</p><p>“Kim Mingyu, Jeon Wonwoo and Lee Yeri.” Jeonghan nodded. “Can you guess which one is the main lead out of the two guys?”</p><p>Seungkwan sucked in his lower lip. He didn’t want to give off the impression that he believed Jeonghan’s delusions but he loved guessing games, and even more, he loved <em>winning </em>. “It’s Wonwoo.”</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>Seungkwan smiled smugly. “Because Mingyu is the kind-hearted and puppy-like second lead who steals everyone’s heart but is too shy to confess to his crush.” He pointed at the scarily well-drawn picture of Yeri, “She prefers the quiet and aloof bad-boy Wonwoo, who later turns out to have a very soft heart underneath the cold exterior.”</p><p>Jeonghan chortled. “Very well. But you’re wrong.”</p><p>“Excuse me?” Seungkwan pointed at Mingyu. “You want to tell me this clumsy mess of a human being is supposed to be the main lead that swooshes Yeri off her feet?”</p><p>“Yes,” Jeonghan affirmed. “You forgot one crucial detail: he’s handsome.”</p><p>Seungkwan stopped in his tracks, his mouth left hanging open as he realized Jeonghan was right. Mingyu had exactly what the majority of comic book readers wanted– a tall, handsome boy with sparkling white teeth and a ripped body. “Whatever,” Seungkwan muttered under his breath. “This is just fictional anyways. For all we know, I could be the main lead.”</p><p>Jeonghan snorted. “Sure, honey.”</p><p>“Boo,” Seungkwan corrected before pointing at the other page of Jeonghan’s comic book. “What’s with these people?”</p><p>“Oh, these are the extras. Characters that aren’t that important but who play an imprtant part in the story: helping the main ones come together and, you know, awkwardly press their lips together for five minutes and call it a day.”</p><p>Seungkwan felt a major migraine attack coming on. “You’re not serious, are you?”</p><p>Jeonghan just smiled calmly, pointing at the different characters, reading out their names. “Lee Woozi, the male lead’s best friend. Seungcheol, the basketball ace.”</p><p>“Ah, stop it!” Seungkwan grabbed the comic book, impatiently scanning the page. “I know these people; you don’t have to explain that to me. They’ve been my classmates since forever.” He looked up. “Or do you want to tell me that’s a lie too?”</p><p>“It’s not a lie. It’s what the writer decided for us.”</p><p>Seungkwan frowned. “Us?”</p><p>“See,” Jeonghan leaned close, pointing at the last row of characters on the page. “There’s me. Oh, and look, you’re right next to me.”</p><p>Seungkwan squinted. It did look a lot like him. He glanced up at Jeonghan, suddenly anxious. “If this is a joke, now’s the time to confess.”</p><p>Jeonghan sighed. “I already told you it’s not.” He took the comic book back, hiding it under his coat once more. “Everything that happens on those pages in that book, you can refer to as <em>stage</em>. Whatever happens on <em>stage, </em>you cannot change. The dialogue, the way you talk and feel– all that is planned out by the writer.”</p><p>“And how come I can stand here and have this outlandish conversation with you right now?” Seungkwan snapped. His patience had run dry.</p><p>“That’s because we’re off stage right now. You see, characters have the ability to freely move and do as they like in between the scenes, at least to a certain degree. That’s because we <em>are</em> real, important is just that we follow the script once the lamplight is on us.”</p><p>Seungkwan pulled his face into a grimace. “Okay, let’s pretend I believe you. Why does no one of us realize that we have no control over our lives? And why do you know so much about that?”</p><p>Jeonghan took a step back, leaning his head to the right, clearly debating what to tell Seungkwan. That man might look like an innocent angelic baby, but he was the wolf in sheep’s clothing, Seungkwan realized.</p><p>“Characters can become aware of themselves. It happens now and so often. Once you’ve become aware, the moments between the pages will become more obvious and you will realize the difference between life on<em> stage </em>and off. To answer your other question, I’m. . . special. That’s all I’ll tell you for now. And you, my friend, have to get out of my kitchen.”</p><p>Not satisfied with Jeonghan’s lackluster answers, Seungkwan was about to protest but it was then when he heard a familiar clicking noise and he found himself sitting in his chair, with Mr. Chen talking about X and Y Chromosomes at the whiteboard. A glance at the clock revealed what Seungkwan already knew: it was Thursday, a day later, and he was sitting in Biology.</p><p>He glanced at his best friends Dokyeom and Sooyoung– both only semi-listening to what Mr. Chen had to say. Sooyoung shot him a curious look but Seungkwan only shook his head in silence. Something wasn’t right with his brain. He should focus on class and deal with this problem of his later. Maybe doctor Kyun could help.</p><p>When he heard someone quietly giggle behind him, Seungkwan first thought someone had somehow heard his inner dialogue and realized he was slowly turning insane, but when he turned, he saw Reun, the class bully, pulling faces at Yeri. She was the new girl and too pretty to be bullied but Seungkwan had never given it a second thought. Plus, he didn’t like to get involved with the girl’s business. Seungkwan had crucial brain cells to protect.</p><p>Someone threw a piece of freshly chewed gum towards Yeri’s general direction. More barely suppressed giggles followed. Seungkwan frowned. A few jokes here and there were annoying but this? Yeri looked seriously pained. Why did no one say anything? Seungkwan scanned the classroom. Most students were either focused on class or were doodeling in their pages, ignoring the scene that took place at the back of the classroom.</p><p>They were afraid of Reun, Seungkwan thought. She was the self-proclaimed leader of the cool girls at school and so they all adored her and did as she liked, tolerating her antics.</p><p>But he was just the same, wasn’t he?</p><p>He bit his lower lip. This didn’t feel like him at all. He hated injustice and wouldn’t just sit around and let someone innocent get bullied like that. So why hadn’t he said anything till now?</p><p>He would put an end to his silence here and now. Determined to help Yeri and show Reun what an ass she’s been since the start of the new school year, Seungkwan rose from his seat– just that he didn’t.</p><p>He tried again. Nothing.</p><p>Almost like he was glued to his seat, Seungkwan was kept in place by an invisible force. More giggling behind his back. Seungkwan fought against the weird sensation, his mind wrestling with his body.</p><p>Tears began to spring into his eyes. This couldn’t be happening. Was he going insane or was this something else? Was this a heart attack? Was he going to die? Were these his last few moments on earth?</p><p>Panicking, the classroom blurred and stretched in front of his inner eye. And before Seungkwan knew it, everything went dark. When he woke a few hours later, he found himself laying in his bedroom, comfortably tucked away under the covers. It was 2. am in the morning.</p><p>Staring at the fake stars on his ceiling, he felt his heart beat strongly under his ribs. <em>Boom . Boom.  Boom. </em></p><p>He and dad had put these stars up there when he had turned ten, as a sort of promise that things would get better. “<em>You’ll always be able to see the stars darling,” </em>he clearly remembered his father saying to him. “<em>Even on days where you can’t see your friends and have to stay in bed, you can always see the stars.”</em></p><p>A tear rolled down his cheek. Letting out a dry laugh, he said into the silence, “I can’t even be the main character of the webtoon that I’m in? My life’s clearly a joke.”</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 1: A single star could save me.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Boo Seungkwan really wanted to believe Jeonghan was lying to him. He wanted to go about his life like he had before, enjoying his last few years at Carat high with his friends. But since Jeonghan had told him about his webtoon-conspiracy, Seungkwan couldn’t help but notice the <em>strange</em> things happening around him.</p><p>This was one of those strange moments. Seungkwan stood in front of the school’s entrance, searching for his phone that had fallen in the pits of his pink bag when someone small (and very strong) grabbed him by the arm and turned him around. Only with difficultly, Seungkwan found his balance, and he exclaimed an angry “Hey!”. But when his palm grazed a familiar cold material, he broke out into a cheerful smile. Fishing out his phone, he glanced at the boy who stood before him.</p><p>“What do you want?”</p><p>Woozi frowned up at him. His blonde eyebrows were drawn together, perfectly demonstrating his annoyance. “You know exactly why I’m here.”</p><p>Seungkwan’s face drew blank. <em>What? </em>He wanted to ask, but instead his mouth began to move on its own accord, saying, “I’m sorry. I felt unwell and stayed in.”</p><p>Suddenly, the sight of Woozi’s round face, his sharky teeth and dark expression cheered him up; it was as if the sight of the boy had pulled him from the depths of a cruel sea, keeping him afloat. When Woozi’s mouth slightly moved, the boy visibly breathing in air, Seungkwan only saw these two pink lips, their movement drawing his full attention.</p><p>“Using your health as an excuse again?” Woozi flicked his tongue. “That’s so you.” He released Seungkwan’s arm, taking a step back. “Causing problems for other people just because you want attention.”</p><p>The accusation stung. Seungkwan shook his head as if to shake off this weird feeling in his chest, the warmth that Woozi seemed to ooze, the desire that the writer had planted in his heart. These weren't his own feelings. He didn't like Woozi, this was just the author playing tricks on him.</p><p>Bewildered, Seungkwan had to listen to himself saying, “I’ll be there next time, I promise," while thinking that he didn’t deserve this kind of treatment at eight am on a Monday morning. He hadn’t even had his iced americano yet.</p><p>Woozi pressed his lips together in a tight line. He stared Seungkwan down like he hated him and wished for him to vanish into thin air. “You know my father gets angry when our plans don’t work out. You wanted this so at least show up for our weekly dinners. That’s the least you can do.”</p><p>Seungkwan’s eyes teared up. He looked to the ground, suddenly sobbing. “I thought you love me too.”</p><p>There was a short silence and when Seungkwan looked up once more, Woozi seemed to have put up a wall of cold ice between them. His face had lost all color and his eyes were two dead pools of darkness, staring past Seungkwan. His hollow sigh plunged Seungkwan back in the ocean.</p><p>“Sure. I love you.”</p><p>Seungkwan didn’t believe him one bit. But he didn’t mind it much in that moment. Woozi had been nothing but mean and aloof, and Seungkwan was tired of the boy’s attitude. He couldn’t quite understand why he was crying right now or why he felt the need to apologize. Still, none of these thoughts passed his lips.</p><p>“Let’s stop talking,” Woozi said coldly. “Just better show up next week.” He turned, leaving Seungkwan standing there like a fool, eyes red-rimmed and face puffy from all the crying.</p><p>“This is stupid,” Seungkwan cursed under his breath, dragging a hand over his nose and eyes. He couldn’t understand himself. Helplessly, he looked around to see if anyone had seen him cry but thankfully he was alone. Quickly, he slipped into the building and headed towards the bathroom.</p><p>Standing infront of the mirror, staring at himself, Seungkwan tried to remember his ride to school. But no matter how much he tried, he couldn't  remember anything that had taken place prior to his conversation with Woozi. His last memory was of him lying in his bed, contemplating what Jeonghan had told him about the world of comics.</p><p>“You’re insane, Boo Seungkwan,” he mumbled at his reflection. His reflection looked back, appearing to be rather helpless and panicked.</p><p>If the conversation with Woozi had been a scene, then why was he still here in the bathroom? Seungkwan frowned. Jeonghan had said that characters could freely act off <em>stage </em>but he hadn’t mentioned for how long. He glanced at his wristwatch, checking the time. Ten minutes till class.</p><p>He rummaged in his backpack until he found his little brown notebook, in which he usually documented his daily vitamin intake. He noted down the incident with Woozi, noting down the date and time of its occurrence and how long he’d been ‘<em>off stage</em>’ already. This might give him some sense of orientation and help him deal with his blackouts. And it might also prove useful once he talked to Doctor Kyun. Quickly he added, <em>memory loss, black outs, hallucinations, changed personality (?)</em></p><p>Then he heard a noise coming from one of the stalls. It sounded like someone was crying. Looking up from his notebook, Seungkwan squinted at the suspicious stall. “Hey, is there someone?” he asked but received no reply.</p><p>Closing his notebook and putting it back in his bag, he took a few deep breaths and walked up to the closed bathroom stall. He softly knocked a few times before saying, “Are you alright? Why are you crying?”</p><p>A loud sob sounded through the bathroom.</p><p>“It was Reun, am I right?” Seungkwan guessed. “She and her minions are assholes. Don’t waste your tears on them.”</p><p>The stall door slowly opened. A sobbing Soonyoung appeared. “Don’t laugh, okay” he said quietly before pushing past Seungkwan and stopping at the sink to throw cold water at his swollen face.</p><p>“Soonyoung?” Seungkwan muttered, confused. He walked up to his friend, placing a hand on his friend’s broad shoulder. “What happened?”</p><p>Soonyoung shrugged. “Yeri happened.” He looked at Seungkwan with sad puppy eyes. “She and Mingyu are dating.”</p><p>“Says who?” Seungkwan snorted.</p><p>Soonyoung pulled a grimace. “Everyone! Apparently, he said that she’s <em>different. </em>Unlike any girl he ever met. And that he will win her over or something.”</p><p>Seungkwan leaned his head to the side. “That’s. . . strange.” Considering his friend’s swollen face, he put on a fake cheerful tone. “But that means they aren’t dating, he’s just kind of interested in her.”</p><p>“Not dating <em>y</em><em>et.” </em>Soonyoung pouted. “Of course, she will go out with him. Everyone likes Mingyu. He’s the hottest boy at school.”</p><p>Seungkwan rolled his eyes. He’d never heard such cringey words out of his friend’s mouth. Or had he?</p><p>“I wish you could hear yourself right now,” he told his best friend. “You sound ridiculous. Mingyu is just a stupid boy, he isn’t worth this drama. And you don’t know if Yeri will like him back just because he’s popular.”</p><p>Soonyoung smiled weakly. “You really think so?”</p><p>Seungkwan nodded enthusiastically. He pulled Soonyoung into a hug, thankful that his best friend was slightly taller than him as he leaned his head on Soonyoung’s shoulder, closing his eyes for a moment, enjoying the warmth and comfort of the hug. The panic and anxiety of the past days seemed to fall off his shoulders.</p><p>“Yes,” he said. “You still have a chance to win him over if you really want to.”</p><p>Soonyoung squeezed Seungkwan before releasing him with a big smile. “Just like you never gave up on winning over Woozi, I won’t stop fighting for Mingyu’s love either.”</p><p>Seungkwan's smile dropped a few notches. "Yeah,” he muttered weakly, feeling like he was doing the wrong thing by encouraging his friend’s delusions.</p><p><em>Why had he never stopped running after Woozi? Wasn’t it a bit pathetic to try to convince someone to love you?</em> <em>Especially if they have openly refused you so many times? </em>Seungkwan bit down on his lower lip, doubting himself.</p><p>Soonyoung had never confessed to Mingyu and might actually still have a real chance with the guy, but Seungkwan <em>had </em>confessed, several times. Although Woozi had made it very clear that he wasn’t interested, Seungkwan’s feelings had never disappeared and he had done everything to make Woozi his, going as far as convincing his father to put pressure on the Lee's, knowing that Woozi's parents would do anything to keep their jobs.</p><p>Staring into the sparkling green eyes of his best friend, Seungkwan thought he had made some very <em>strang</em>e decisions in his life. It didn’t sound like him at all.</p><p>In that moment, a strange flipping noise rang in his ear and the next time he blinked, he stood in the school’s cafeteria, sipping on an extra strong iced americano as he overlooked the crowd of whispering students. Almost choking on his sip of coffee, he coughed dramatically, gasping for air.</p><p>Having become aware of his changed surroundings, he wondered why everyone was whispering to each other. He didn’t have to wonder for long though because when he looked to the cafeteria door, he saw that Kim Mingyu, Jeon Wonwoo and Lee Woozi had just entered the scene, the first two hovering over the crowd with their intimidating height and the latter sending chilling looks at everyone who dared to glance at him.</p><p>These were the legendary A3, the most popular guys at Carat high who were followed around by fawning hordes of females at all times.</p><p>Their mere existence strook Seungkwan as rather<em> strange</em> as he watched these three otherworldly handsome boys walking towards from where he stood at the counter. His eyes fell on Woozi but the boy stared straight ahead, clearly not in the mood to give him time of the day. Of course. <em>It’s not like we are engaged, and you should love me, </em>Seungkwan thought to himself, bitterly taking another sip of his favorite beverage. He ought to get his attention, but how?</p><p>Another figure drew his attention: Lee Yeri, the new girl, who had turned around with a plate full of what looked like a lukewarm portion of casserole and was heading straight towards A3. Seungkwan squinted at her. His brain had already predicated what was to come before she could take a step and trip, crashing into Mingyu and dropping her plate to the ground.</p><p>With astonishment, Seungkwan watched as clumsy Yeri and Mingyu both fell to the ground in slow motion, landing in a very tropey accidental kiss situation, with Yeri’s face closely hovering over Mingyu’s lips and Mingyu looking stunned for a moment, before he began to complain that she almost ruined his school uniform and his <em>face. </em>Seungkwan rolled his eyes at the audacity of this boy.</p><p>Placing his coffee on the canteen counter, he was ready to lend a friendly hand and help the new girl up, but he found himself glued to the spot. Helplessly, he had to watch as a small crowd of teenage girls formed around Yeri, who was still sitting on the floor of the cafeteria. Reun and her friends surrounded her and began hassling her for being admitted to the school on a sponsorship, calling her ugly and dumb.</p><p>Seungkwan’s blood was boiling. Every cell of his body screamed at him to punch that girl in the face and safe Yeri from the crowd of jealous hyenas that ate everything up that came out of jerk-face Mingyu’s mouth. But of course, he had to stay put until A3 had long left the Cafeteria and Yeri had disappeared for the bathroom. It was infuriating, really. At least, Yeri had given Mingyu a piece of her mind, telling him that he wasn’t special and had no right to snap at her for a simple misstep.</p><p>Finally released by the magical force that had kept him prisoner, Seungkwan leaned against the counter, muttering, “I <em>must</em> be hallucinating.”</p><p>Dokyeom nudged him in the sides, “Dude, we want some food too. Hurry up and take your plate, will you?”</p><p>“Yeah, do you want us to starve to death?” Soonyoung chirped behind him in the line. Seungkwan glanced at them, wondering why his friends weren’t concerned with the scene that had just unfolded in front of them.</p><p>“Don’t you guys care at all?”</p><p>Dokyeom frowned, “What do you mean, Kwannie? Is something wrong?” He seemed to be genuinely concerned but just as clueless as Seungkwan felt. </p><p>“Yeri being bullied by A3 and Reun?”</p><p>Soonyoung pushed past Dokyeom, taking a hold of Seungkwan’s plate. “Let me take this,” he chirped, heading straight for the closest table. Seungkwan could hear his stomach growling from here.</p><p>“I don’t think Yeri is getting bullied,” Dokyeom laughed, shaking his head at Seungkwan. “Everyone likes her.”</p><p>“No,” Seungkwan retorted. “Didn’t you just see how they were talking about her?”</p><p>Dokyeom grimaced. “Kwannie, I’m really hungry. I don’t know what you’re talking about, but can we move on, please?”</p><p>Seungkwan’s shoulders dropped in defeat. His best friends really didn’t seem to understand him. It was almost as if his friends were completely unaware of their surroundings, as if they had just blankly watched a movie scene unfold in front of her eyes without paying it much attention, accepting whatever had happened as unavoidable, predetermined. And that’s what Jeonghan had said, right?</p><p>Seungkwan had just been witness of another <em>stage </em>and since he was the only one being aware of himself, he’d questioned his role in it. But Soonyoung and Dokyeom were still unaware and therefore clueless.</p><p><em>Wouldn’t a Boo Seungkwan stand up against injustice? </em>Seungkwan thought, glancing at Dokyeom and Soonyoung as they were sitting down at the table, munching away at their food. <em>Shouldn’t my friends be more serious about this too? </em>If Jeonghan was really right about his theory, the writer of this story was awfully bad at characterization.</p><p>Seungkwan took a seat next this friends and gazed at his still full plate of food. “If I’m real, but this world isn’t, does that mean I’m like an actor with a shitty role?”</p><p>“Hm?” Dokyeom said, glancing at him. “Did you say something?”</p><p>Seungkwan flushed. “No, no. Forget it.” He shook his head, knowing that his thoughts were ridiculous. He knew his friends wouldn’t necessarily judge him, but he was still embarrassed of the thought of sharing Jeonghan’s delusions with them.</p><p>He tried to pretend everything was fine, but he could only force down a few bites of food before the world around him became staticky and blurry once more. That noise like a page turning appeared again and a moment after the blip, Seungkwan found himself sitting in his classroom, with his friends goofing off around him.</p><p>Soonyoung was leaning on Seungkwan’s desk, playing around with Seungkwan’s favorite pen as he announced that he was very glad humans had five fingers. “I love multiples of five and hate odd and even numbers expect five and ten and so on. Imagine our fingers– Hey!”</p><p>Seungkwan snapped his pen out of Soonyoungs open mouth, saving it from his friend’s disgusting spit. Scanning it for bite marks he muttered, “You owe me a full set of brand-new ones.”</p><p>“I owe you nothing,” Soonyoung happily announced, smiling as brightly as the sun itself. “Why are you so grumpy, huh? Did something happen with Woozi?”</p><p>“Was he mean to you again?” Dokyeom asked from Seungkwans left.</p><p>“I- What? No, that’s not it.”</p><p>Seungkwan helplessly glanced at Dokyeom and Soonyoung, wondering how he could explain his problem to his two best friends. He’d never been confronted with something like this and he had no idea how to explain himself.</p><p>“It’s okay,” Soonyoung said cheerfully, placing a hand on top of Seungkwan’s, squeezing it in a comforting manner. “There’s no one in our class that doesn’t know that you like him.”</p><p>“Actually, I’m not that happy with him lately. He’s been acting like a jerk.”</p><p>Soonyoung’s mouth dropped wide open. "A what?!”</p><p>“I never really noticed, I guess. But he’s really mean?”</p><p>Soonyoung and Dokyeom exchanged a look. “He’s been your first love since kindergarden,” Dokyeom said carefully.</p><p>Seungkwan shrugged. “Things can change.”</p><p>“But you never had a problem with his temper,” Soonyoung retorted. “He might be cold and a bit mean sometimes, and literally insane when he’s annoyed, but he’s <em>good-looking.</em> You always said he’s the one for you.”</p><p>Seungkwan grimaced. This didn’t sound like him at all, but he did vaguely remember being head over heels for Woozi up till a few days ago. “Yeah, that’s true. But good looks aren’t everything.”</p><p>Soonyoung chirped a brow, exchanging another look with Dokyeom. “I guess so,” he muttered quietly, turning around in his seat. Dokyeom opened up his math book, suddenly very intrigued by something.</p><p>Feeling like a fool, Seungkwan sat in his seat, wondering why his friends couldn’t understand him. Was it true what Jeonghan had said? Were they really <em>not aware</em> of themselves, not really there, mind washed by whatever the writer had set out for them? Just like Seungkwan had been for most of his life?</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Seungkwan sat in Doctor Kyun’s office, like every Saturday, waiting for the busy man to appear with his blood test results. He was more nervous than usual as there was something at the back of his mind.</p><p>When Doctor Kyun finally entered, Seungkwan jumped up from his seat.</p><p>“Oh, Kwannie! Someone’s a bundle of nerves today,” laughed Doctor Kyun, placing a hand on Seungkwan’s shoulder, pressing him back down into his seat. “Don’t you have your mid-terms soon?”</p><p>“Yes,” Seungkwan stuttered, looking up at the man who was more like a family member to him than a doctor. “But that’s not why I am this stressed out.”</p><p>Doctor Kyun frowned, taking his seat at the table. “Your test results are fine,” he said, scanning the piece of paper in his hand. “You shouldn’t be worrying about that.”</p><p>Seungkwan shook his head. “This makes no sense,” he whined.</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“I thought that I'm feeling weird lately because of the new heart medication that I’m on or that it’s a side-effect of my heart surgery.” He looked down, defeated. “But I guess I was wrong.”</p><p>“Weird?” Doctor Kyun leaned forward, frowning. “What do you mean, Seungkwan?”</p><p>“I struggle with memory loss. And I keep hearing weird noises. And I feel like my personality has changed.”</p><p>Doctor Kyun laughed. “Ah, Seungkwan. You talk as if you’re dying. Everything is fine, really. Your father said you cut back on sleep to study more. The weather is getting hotter and you strained your weak heart. If you rest more, drink enough water and take your meds, you should be feeling better in no time.”</p><p>Seungkwan pouted. “It’s not the first day that I’m sick! I am telling you; I keep hearing strange noises and I teleport from place to place with no memory how I got there.”</p><p>Doctor Kyun gave him an empathic smile. “I understand that this time has been very stressful for you. But people don’t suddenly go crazy. It sounds like you are experiencing symptoms caused by a lack of sleep, especially with your weak heart. If you still have these problems in a month, we can seriously start to worry. Alright?”</p><p>“Alright,” Seungkwan muttered. He didn’t know how much time he had left before he’d lose time again. He didn’t even know what <em>stage</em> he would be thrown in next. All control over his life had been taken from him, or at least the illusion of control which had soothed him before. A single tear rolled down his cheek and he quickly brushed it away, trying to put on a brave face.</p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p>“No need to thank me, Kwannie” Doctor Kyun said, and his smiling face was the last thing Seungkwan saw before he found himself at school, standing in the hallway. In his hands, he held a schoolbook, his brown notebook and his pencil case. Quickly, he took out a pen and noted down his doctor appointment.</p><p>“How long was it?” he muttered under his breath, trying to remember how much time had passed. The world of comics seemed to be more complicated than originally thought. As exhausting as it was, he wasn’t going to give up making sense of his situation. Once he knew more about the rules of this world, he could come up with a plan to change his situation.</p><p>“There you are!”</p><p>A nasal voice startled Seungkwan and he dropped his notebook. Woozi caught it mid-air, looking just as upset and annoyed as he had the last time they’d met.</p><p>“Oh, thank you,” Seungkwan said but Woozi shrugged it off, giving him the book back without much of an emotional response.</p><p>“You went to the hospital, right?”</p><p>Seungkwan blushed. <em>Blushed. </em>What the hell was happening to him? He opened his mouth to say, <em>And what about it? </em>but instead, he quietly mumbled, “I wasn’t feeling well.”</p><p>“You never do,” Woozi retorted. “You should have told me. Dad found out about it this morning and I got scolded just because you can’t seem to be bothered to shoot me a message.”</p><p>Seungkwan shook his head, “I forgot, sorry. I was feeling so unwell and. . .”</p><p>“I don’t want to hear it.” Woozi shook his head, his face an angry grimace. “You’re just blaming your heart condition like always.”</p><p>Seungkwan balled his hands to fist. He wanted to scream, <em>It’s your fault for not coming! I am not obligated to remind you when I go to the hospital. It’s always the same date anyway! </em></p><p>“I’m sorry, Woozi. But you have to believe me when I say that I’m seriously sick. My heart is so weak and–“</p><p>Woozi laughed direly. “Yeah, sure it is. You did that on purpose to punish me, right?”</p><p>“Seriously, I was sick!”</p><p>“First, you don’t attend our weekly dinner and now you <em>forget </em>telling me that you went to the hospital. Are you trying to ruin my life?”</p><p>Tears began to form in the corners of Seungwan’s eyes. Inside, he was burning with anger, but he couldn’t express any of that, having to follow whatever the writer had planned out for him. Not being able to express himself and being forced into submission just made him even more angry. He swore himself he would find a way to take revenge and get control over his life.</p><p>“Wait, forget that,” Woozi continued with his rant. “Of course, you are trying to ruin my life, fiancée.” He spat out the last word like venom before he turned and stormed down the hall. It was almost comedic to watch him run away like that. But Seungkwan didn’t feel like laughing at all.</p><p>Exhausted, he sank against the wall, resting his head back at the cold stone. “It’s not my fault, asshole,” he muttered. The <em>stage </em>was thankfully over. Feeling too exhausted to look at his wristwatch and put down the time in his notebook, he walked straight to class, hoping he could have a few moments of peace and quiet before he had to 'jump' in time again.</p><p>Once seated, he turned to Dokyeom, finally telling him about his weird symptoms, and how Woozi had been mean to him again. “Everyone knows you like Woozi,” Dokyeom just said, giving him a confused look.</p><p>Seungkwan felt like crying. “Aren’t you listening to what I’m saying?!” Before he could say anything else, he heard the familiar noise. A moment later, he found himself holding what looked like a self-made stuffed animal. It was a teddy bear with a big red heart on his belly that read, <em>To my love. </em></p><p>“What on earth?”</p><p>Seungkwan stared at the stuffed animal, wondering if he was really going insane. Soonyoung pushed him forward, grinning brightly. “Go on, love birds!”</p><p>Confused, Seungkwan glanced around him and realized Soonyoung was pushing him towards where Woozi and Mingyu were standing, currently engrossed in a conversation with Yeri. Mingyu seemed to be flirting, the tips of his ears bright red. Seungkwan’s body moved on his own accord, heading straight at Woozi, who pulled a grimace upon noticing Seungkwan.</p><p>
  <em>Oh no no no no no. Stop!! </em>
</p><p>Yeri giggled, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear as Mingyu leaned a bit closer to her, smiling at the stuffed bunny in her hand. “Does he have a name yet?” he asked, clearly happy about his present.</p><p>“Hey,” Seungkwan heard himself say, drawing their attention to him. Yeri gave him a warm smile but Mingyu seemed clearly uncomfortable.</p><p>“What do you want?” Woozi asked, stepping infront of Seungkwan.</p><p>“Uhm,” Seungkwan started, looking down on the teddy bear. Blushing, he held it out for Woozi. “I made this for you.”</p><p>Woozi didn’t smile. He didn’t blush like Mingyu had either. Instead, he raised one single eyebrow, considering Seungkwan as if he was truly insane. “Thank you,” he muttered coldly, reluctantly taking the stuffed animal.</p><p>Seungkwan smiled at him cheerfully. He turned around, signaling a thumbs up to Soonyoung who was waiting for him on the other side of the hallway.</p><p>“Can you go now?” Woozi asked, stuffing the toy into his locker.</p><p>Seungkwan nodded, still sending heart-eyes towards Woozi, “Sure.” When he turned, he could hear Mingyu’s voice quietly asking Woozi how he’d been able to endure Seungkwan’s ‘stalking’ for ten years.</p><p>Once he had returned to Soonyoung, his smile faded and he thought in horror, “Something is seriously wrong with me.”</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“What’s up with you?” Jeonghan asked, stopping in his tracks as he noticed a very distressed Seungkwan sitting on the floor of his beloved kitchen.</p><p>“Everything,” Seungkwan whispered dramatically, burring his head in his arms.</p><p>“Ah, things can’t be that bad,” Jeonghan said, calmly going back to his work. For a while, Seungkwan just watched the man chopping carrots and bell peppers. The sight was oddly relaxing to him and it helped him to calm his heart until he was able to stand up and walk over to where the man was standing.</p><p>“So you realized I wasn’t lying to you?”</p><p>Seungkwan nodded, pouting.</p><p>Jeonghan glanced at him, smiling a bit when he noticed his expression. “You’re lucky that you’re kind of cute sometimes. I usually don’t have that much patience with people.”</p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p>Jeonghan raised a brow. “That wasn’t a compliment.”</p><p>“You said I’m cute. I take that as a compliment,” Seungkwan said, but not in the mood for small talk, he quickly changed the topic. “Tell me more about the world of comics.”</p><p>“You’d better not know.”</p><p>“Just tell me,” Seungkwan urged, more concerned and anxious than just a few days ago, now that he wasn’t just experiencing the blackouts but was also behaving strangely.</p><p>Sighing, Jeonghan turned to him. “Fine. What do you want to know?”</p><p>“Why me?” Seungkwan asked. “I already have a heart condition, why is this shit happening to me out of all people?”</p><p>“Well, you have a heart condition because the writer wanted it like that. It’s a plot tool. So that question is redundant.”</p><p>“It’s a what?” Seungkwan felt like he was going to explode with sudden rage. All his life he had suffered, had spent most of his childhood in a hospital and now he was supposed to believe he had to go through all of that because of a stupid webtoon?!</p><p>“Nobody cares about side characters,” Jeonghan deadpanned. “Your character is just an <em>extra. </em>Your traumatic backstory only exists because it makes things a bit more interesting."</p><p>“Fuck the writer.”</p><p>“Too many insults for a day,” Jeonghan said, turning back to his vegetables. He seemed to be done with the conversation but Seungkwan was just starting. “You didn’t answer my other question,” he insisted.</p><p>“Oh,” Jeonghan said. “If you’re wondering if you're someone special, you're not.” He said this with a straight face, as if he was stating mere facts.</p><p>Seungkwan grimaced. “Thank you for this nonsense,” he snapped at the man, all rules of etiquette long forgotten. He stared at the canteen man, shaking with rage. Jeonghan was clearly keeping secrets from him and refused to tell Seungkwan anything that could help him figure out his situation.</p><p>“If you don’t want to help me, that’s fine. I’m going to fight against this on my own then.”</p><p>Jeonghan laughed out loud. “You can’t be serious.”</p><p>“Why not?” Seungkwan snapped. “I’ve just started to realize who I really am and you know what? That person is really stubborn and . . . witty and strong. Strong enough to get through this nonsense by myself. Just watch me.”</p><p>He turned, but Jeonghan grabbed his arm, stopping him from walking away. “Wait. You can’t do that.”</p><p>Seungkwan rolled his eyes. “And why not?”</p><p>“Because you will mess things up. And that will have bad consequences.”</p><p>“Worse than living with the knowledge that you are a mere side character in a stupid romance webtoon and that you could die at any given moment if the writer decides it helps his stupid plot develop?”</p><p>Jeonghan fell silent, still holding on to Seungkwan.</p><p>“No?” Seungkwan asked, trying to free himself from the man’s grib. “Then let me go.”</p><p>“Seungkwan, you don’t understand–“</p><p>“No, <em>you </em>don’t understand. You were right about the things you said about me. I’m unimportant. Why would the writer make me have a terminal illness? Because my death will be useful in some way. And I'm not going to let that person kill me."</p><p>Jeonghan said nothing. It seemed like he had no perfect explanation for this. No lies he could feed Seungkwan.</p><p>“Let. Me. Go.” Seungkwan ordered and this time, Jeonghan obeyed.</p><p>“Fine, go. You won’t listen to me anyway.”</p><p>Seungkwan nodded, heading towards the exit. Yes, he might have not asked to live this life, but he was here now, and he wouldn’t give it up so easily. He would change the course of his life and safe himself.</p><p>The writer might have dreamed him up– but he was going to take charge of his life now. He would find a way to stop this madness. He wouldn’t let anybody, and especially not Jeonghan, convince him that this was how his world was and therefore must be.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Over time, Seungkwan experienced more blackouts. A part of him knew that what Jeonghan said was right and these weren’t actually blackouts but just the gaps between the pages of the webtoon he was part of, but trying to stay sane, he refused to admit this to himself. Sometimes the time-gap between the <em>stages </em>amounted to just a couple of hours, sometimes several days. Seungkwan never knew whether he’d find himself in the hospital on an IV drip, standing in the middle of the street, or at school.</p><p>Trying to investigate on his own, he went into the school library one afternoon, pulling a few books from the shelves, then sitting on the floor and flipping through them, looking for information on memory loss and hallucinations.</p><p>He searched in vain for a couple of hours until he looked up and noticed one of the books wobbling on the shelf, surrounded by tiny purple sparkles.</p><p>“What the. . .?” He jumped up and grabbed it, watching as the letters of the title moved as if by magic. He shuffled through the pages, realizing he was holding a webtoon in his hand and not just any– it was the one Jeonghan had shown him the other day.</p><p>Seungkwan froze as he recognized a scene: There was him in his school uniform staring at Woozi with teary eyes, begging the boy to forgive him. “I remember this,” Seungkwan thought. He flipped through a few more pages until he found a few pages about the dinner he and his father had shared at Woozi’s.</p><p>“So this is real, huh?” He read his character description once more: Boo Seungkwan (18), Lee Woozi’s fiancée. Terminally ill.</p><p>
  <em>The writer is going to kill me off eventually. How much time do I have left? </em>
</p><p>His quest to change his fate suddenly became much more urgent as Seungkwan realized that he wasn’t going crazy and that he was really a character in a comic. Having an idea of what the writer had planned for his character, the stakes were high, and Seungkwan knew he had to find a way to change his fate before it was too late.</p><p>With shaking hands, he shuffled through he pages till he found the last scene: Wonwoo and Mingyu were arguing about who got to be Yeri’s partner for the chemistry assignment. Wonwoo called Mingyu arrogant, and the whole class gasped. Mingyu advanced on him, causing Wonwoo to back up.</p><p>“Ridiculous,” Seungkwan said, shaking his head. He flipped the page and found– nothing. All the following pages were empty. The writer hadn’t drawn them yet, Seungkwan figured. Staring at the empty pages, he suddenly heard a sharp noise and experienced a strange vision:</p><p>He saw himself walking next to Yeri. They were crossing the busy street in front of Carat high. Chatting animatedly and laughing about something, they both didn't realize the big black car heading straight at them.Out of nowhere, Wonwoo appeared and grabbed Yeri. He pulled her to safety, but Seungkwan fell to the ground, holding his heart, suddenly breathless. Half-unconscious, he landed on the cold ground, inevitably hit by the car.</p><p>Seungkwan dropped the webtoon. <em>No no no no no. This can’t be happening.</em></p><p>This was worse than dying of heartache. Panicking, Seungkwan picked up the webtoon from the floor and headed straight to the school’s cafeteria in hopes he would find answers there. Luckily, Jeonghan was in his kitchen, curiously looking up from his cookbook when Seungkwan waltzed in, breathless and drenched in sweat.</p><p>“Jeonghan! Thank god.”</p><p>Jeonghan laughed.  “I’ve never seen you so happy to see me.”</p><p>“Desperate times call for desperate measures.” Seungkwan tossed the book on the counter and pointed to the blank pages. "I– I had a . . .vision. A vision of my death. The writer will let me get run over by a car.”</p><p>"When?"</p><p>"I don't know. Next week, tomorrow, maybe after our conversation. I'm running out of time."</p><p>"Hey, calm down." Jeonghan put a hand on Seungkwan's shoulder and smiled weakly. "Everything’s going to be fine."</p><p>"Nothing’s going to be <em>fine</em>! Are you deaf? The author wants to kill me and that soon!"</p><p>Jeonghan eyed Seungkwan for a moment before sighing and saying, "All right. I'll tell you what I know. What you saw was the <em>storyboard</em>, a rough sketch of future events planned by the writer.”</p><p>“A… storyboard?” Seungkwan frowned, thinking. “If it’s just a rough draft then I can change it, right?”</p><p>Jeonghan grimaced. “I don’t think so. It’s impossible to influence the writer. We have no way to communicate with him.”</p><p>“I don’t need to talk to him. I’ll find another way to influence this story.”</p><p>“Seungkwan. . . You have to accept–“</p><p>“My death?” Seungkwan shook his head. “I can’t do that, I’m sorry.”</p><p>“You’re going to get into trouble,” Jeonghan retorted, his long hair framing his button nose and prim lips, as he leaned forward, cornering the smaller boy. “You’re going to get <em>me</em> into trouble.”</p><p>“So?” Seungkwan said. “What is it with you and rules anyway?”</p><p>“Nothing,” he said. “It’s just dangerous to meddle with this world.” He spoke slowly, deliberately, as if each word required separate consideration. “You had a nice life up till now. Why do you want to cause more pain for yourself by fighting your faith? Look, you’re shaking. What are you afraid of? You will have the ending your story deserves. Don’t fight it.”</p><p>“I’m not shaking,” Seungkwan lied. He felt sick, but shrugging his panic off, he grabbed the webtoon and hid it behind his back. “This is mine now.”</p><p>“This is a mistake, Seungkwan,” Jeonghan muttered. Seungkwan looked at him. Those lively brown eyes made it hard for him to think.</p><p>“So be it.”</p><p>He turned, more determined than ever to change his faith.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>It was nice to find out things about himself. Every day that passed, Seungkwan learned something new about himself, about the <em>real</em> him, not the sick and quiet boy that the writer had come up with for his stupid story.</p><p>
  <em>He was witty.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was humorous.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was stubborn.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was sassy and bubbly.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was sensitive.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was impatient.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was moody and temperamental.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was curious.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was decisive.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was loyal.</em>
</p><p>And for all his insecurities, he did prefer the real Boo Seungkwan and quite liked him at times. He was way more realistic and entertaining than his role in the webtoon. At times when he was forced to read out his lines, beg for Woozi’s attention, and disregard all of his pride, he felt his role was rather pathetic and plain. So uninteresting it hurt.</p><p>It didn’t feel fair. Even side characters deserved their own story.</p><p>“Boo Seungkwan, will you please get out of my way?!” Woozi was currently screaming at him, drenched in rain from head to toe and hands balled into fists. He was shaking from anger and his lips were thin and white, his eyes two dark black holes.</p><p>“I just want you to love me,” Seungkwan cried out in a weak voice, his heart beating irregularly. He pressed a hand to his chest, grimacing in pain. The world around him was blurry around the edges and he could feel himself faint any minute, still he couldn’t help but stay glued to his spot, forced to act out this ridiculous scene.</p><p>“Don’t you get it, Seungkwan?” Woozi said bitterly, adverting his face. “Stop playing sick. It’s not like you’re going to die.” The rain dropped off the blonde strands of his fringe, running along his nose and dropping down to his lips. Seungkwan’s eyes followed their movement and his body moved on its own accord, taking a step closer and pressing a cold kiss to Woozi’s lips.</p><p>It was mere press of lips, quick and chaste. Woozi violently pushed him off, making Seungkwan lose his balance. Woozi had already turned around, exiting the scene as Seungkwan fell to the ground, kneeling in a puddle of cold rainwater and coughing for air, his heart too weak to handle the stress of the current situation.</p><p>
  <em>Is this it? Is this how I’m going to die? How pathetic. . .</em>
</p><p>Pressing his eyes shut, he told himself not to cry, not to panic. He forced himself to take even breaths, to not freak out.</p><p>“Not like this,” he kept coughing. “Please, not because of that idiot.”</p><p>It was then that he felt the warm embrace of a jacket being thrown over his shoulders, and two arms that gently picked him up from the ground. Seungkwan clinged to the warmth, throwing his arms around broad shoulders and his legs around a slim torso. He breathed in a sweet scent and felt his heartbeat calm as he closed his eyes and buried his wet face in the stranger’s soft sweater.</p><p>He felt the cold wind, the stranger’s heartbeat, and he heard a song in his heart again; it was a silly rush he used to get as a child, thinking he could teleport to the stars. It was as if the universe was singing a tender song. He couldn’t tell if it was real or a dream because it felt impossible. He knew these arms, this chest, this heartbeat. This person could help him, he felt that in his bones.</p><p>“You need to call my doctor,” Seungkwan said weakly, but he wasn’t sure if the stranger had heard him. Fighting against his weakness, he attempted to repeat himself, this time only a bit louder.</p><p>“You… need…”</p><p>His body suddenly felt so heavy.</p><p>“to. . .”</p><p>He heard the sound of rain beating against the windows, and the air he inhaled was warm and sticky.</p><p>“Call. . .”</p><p>Seungkwan slowly became aware of the fact that he was still being held. It was clear to him by the way he was positioned now, that the stranger was sitting and that Seungkwan was on his lap, head leaning on the man’s shoulder, nose pressing into his throat. He was still wet and cold to the bones, but the stranger didn’t seem to mind that one bit, embracing him so tightly.</p><p>To Seungkwan’s surprise, he wasn’t uncomfortable with this closeness. He liked listening to the person’s faint heart–beat, enjoyed feeling the calm intake of breaths as if they were his own. The stranger’s body had become Seungkwan’s island, and the movement of the stranger’s chest were the waves of the calm sea, swaying and rocking him like a child. Protective, affectionate.</p><p>Like this, they sat for what felt like a lifetime. When Seungkwan woke in his bed, clothes and hair dry, and the night as if nothing had happened, he sighed out in yearning. He could not name why he felt this way about a stranger. Still, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he knew that person. It was as if he’d found his missing puzzle piece. Embraced like that, things had finally been <em>right . </em>This was how things were supposed to be.</p><p>It hadn’t been a <em>stage</em>, that’s all Seungkwan knew. What he had felt had been real. The emotions had been <em>his. </em>Nobody had forced either of them to do what they had done. And that was precious.</p><p>“Who are you?” Seungkwan whispered into the darkness of his room. He brought a hand up to his chest, feeling his heartbeat underneath his palm. Strong and alive. Staring at the dimly glowing fake stars on his ceiling, he listened to what his heart was telling him.</p><p>“You’re the brightest star I’ve ever seen,” he whispered. “And I’ll find you. Just wait for me.”</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Watching the main plot of the webtoon unfold could be quite entertaining and hilarious at times. Obviously, Yeri found herself in a complicated situation, having to decide which man she favored: Mingyu or Wonwoo. Seungkwan was forced to watch a shy Wonwoo stare at Yeri during class and eventually talk to her for the first time as they both grabbed for the same book in the library. He rolled his eyes at them shyly smiling at each other as they both quickly pulled away their hands.</p><p>“Just make out already,” he moaned when Mingyu threw a fit in the cafeteria because Yeri had decided to sit next to Wonwoo, not him. And he yawned when Yeri broke out in tears because she believed Mingyu to have a girlfriend which later turned out to be his sister-in-law.</p><p>For a moment, Seungkwan even entertained the thought of bringing popcorn to school but he knew it would be a waste of effort as the writer dictated what each character did during the <em>stage. </em>He would force him to applaud whenever Mingyu did something ‘cool’ and ‘amazing’, to cheer for Wonwoo during his basketball game and to keep his mouth shut at cringy or awkward moments between the female lead and her love interests. It was a particular kind of hell.</p><p>“They did <em>what</em> to you?” Mingyu was currently screaming across the football yard, seemingly ready to commit a murder for his crush.</p><p>Yeri shook her head in panic, trying to calm him by ensuring him that Reun and her friends meant no harm. She wasn’t being bullied, no, they were just doing what girls did. It was an obvious lie and even thick-witted Mingyu saw through that.</p><p>“No. I will make them pay.”</p><p>“Don’t,” Yeri cried out, blocking Mingyu’s way. Seungkwan glanced at his wristwatch, wondering when their dramatic conversation would find an end. He kind of hoped they could resume their game because it just had become interesting. Not that football was his favorite sports– nothing could top volleyball– but still.</p><p>“You’re <em>mine. </em>And nobody, nobody, lays a goddam finger on you.”</p><p>Seungkwan sighed. Of course. A line like this couldn’t be missing in a webtoon. He watched Mingyu run off the scene, with a nervous Yeri following him across the yard. He’d probably confront Reun in the next <em>stage</em>, so they didn’t have much time left.</p><p>Seungkwan jumped up and screamed, “Everybody, go go go! We can still win this game. Dino, you take Mingyu’s spot in the team.”</p><p>“Seungkwan, are you sure you can play?” Seungcheol muttered, scratching his head. He had barely let Seungkwan join the game in the first place but Seungkwan could be pretty convincing when he wanted. Another new thing he’d learned about himself.</p><p>The game resumed and Seungkwan laughed through the sweat, the aching of his body, the pain in his muscles, the flutter of his heart. This was what being alive felt like and nobody would be able to take that away from him. He enjoyed the next few minutes on the field, when someone in the crowd caught his attention. There was a tall boy with shiny golden hair sitting on the bleachers, staring right at him as he ran by, hair brushed back from the wind.</p><p>It was as if someone had pressed the pause button; Seungkwan moved in slow motion, their eyes still interlocked.</p><p>The boy had a killer gaze, but his almond-shaped eyes seemed kind to Seungkwan, somehow familiar. He seemed to look right at Seungkwan, no, <em>through</em> him, right at his soul, looking past the superficial exterior.</p><p>
  <em>Do I know you?</em>
</p><p>Warm eyes, long eyelashes, full eyebrows, straight nose, narrow lips– Seungkwan took in all of the boy’s face, wishing this moment could last forever, that he’d never have to lie his eyes on something else ever again. Almost hungrily did the boy look back, eyes following Seungkwan as he moved across the field.</p><p>Then, there was that noise again and Seungkwan was back in his classroom, wearing his school uniform instead of his sport clothes. Frustrated, he banged his head against his table. “Why,” he complained. “Why am I cursed like this?”</p><p>Without lifting his head, he gazed to his right where Soonyoung smiled at him from his seat. “Did you and Woozi fight?”</p><p>“The world doesn’t revolve around Lee Woozi, do you know that?”</p><p>Soonyoung leaned his head to the side, faking to be in deep thought. “I thought yours does,” he said, seemingly unaware of Seungkwan’s foul mood.</p><p>“Well, you thought wrong.” Seungkwan lifted his head off his table, glancing at the back of the classroom where Woozi was scribbling something down.</p><p>“Stupid idiot,” Seungkwan cursed under his breath, wishing looks could kill. A small voice at the back of his mind whispered to him that maybe, just maybe, Woozi was a nice person just like Seungkwan was nothing like the <em>stage </em>Seungkwan. But he brushed that thought off, not in the mood to be the bigger person.</p><p>“I suffer every day, why should I be nice to a person who treats me like shit?” he thought to himself.</p><p>Woozi didn’t give him much chance to change his opinion either. That Wednesday, when Seungkwan found himself sharing dinner with the Lee’s, Woozi sat next to him at the table, staring at this plate, not even looking up once to speak to Seungkwan. He was more ghost than human in that moment.</p><p>His father attempted to talk about business with Seungkwan’s father, clearly desperate for the wealthier man’s approval. It was an uncomfortable situation for everyone involved and the atmosphere was tense. Seungkwan chewed on a particular dry piece of lamb.</p><p>“Seungkwan and Woozi are such a sweet couple,” his father was saying right now, smiling at them both.</p><p>“Indeed,” Woozi’s father chirped in, forcing a strained smile. “Aren’t you two happy together?”</p><p>For the first time that evening, Woozi looked up. His eyes were grey and lifeless as he looked at Seungkwan and willed his thin lips into a smile. He placed a cold hand on Seungkwan’s shoulder, “Of course, we are. Seungkwan is the best boyfriend that I could wish for.” Seungkwan heard the resentment in his tone.</p><p>“Fiancée,” his father corrected him, laughing. Seungkwan could see his sweat run down his neck.</p><p>“Fiancée, of course,” Woozi repeated with his monotone voice. Seungkwan felt a tad bad for him. He didn’t like the position he was in, clearly the superior of them two, aware of the power and privilege that came with his wealth. On <em>stage</em>, he’d believed that money could even buy love. A foolish thing to hope for.</p><p>He side-eyed Woozi’s profile. He was a good son, Seungkwan thought. He had given up his love life for his father’s success, knowing that it was good for business to please the son of his father’s boss. As long Seungkwan was satisfied, Woozi’s father got to keep his job.</p><p>The worst was that even though Seungkwan saw the unfairness of the situation, he couldn’t do anything to change it. He couldn’t apologize to Woozi and he couldn’t tell his father that his feelings had changed, and that he no longer was in love with the boy. Instead, he was forced to sit there and chew on his dry lamb, blushing at Woozi now and then, telling his father how happy his fiancée made him.</p><p>“Your mother is an excellent cook,” Seungkwan’s father told Woozi once they were finished with dinner, smiling at the smaller one.</p><p>Woozi growled, “Mother, my foot,” under his breath, but when his father glared at him, he put on a poker-face as he turned to Seungkwan, saying he could come over anytime. And of course, Seungkwan was forced to blush and shyly tell him he’d love to.</p><p>As he was disappearing into his room, Woozi stopped him, holding tightly onto his arm. His facial expression was unreadable.</p><p>“Why can’t you just let me go?”</p><p>Seungkwan shook of him off. “I have no idea either. You’re quite the asshole.”</p><p>“What?” Woozi’s eyes grew wide. He was looking at Seungkwan like he was a pink elephant. “What did you just say?”</p><p>Seungkwan stuck out his chin. “You heard me right. I’m sick, for god’s sake.” He folded his arms in front of his chest, not intimidated. The <em>stage </em>had finally found an end and he had a few moments left to finally tell Woozi about his real feelings.</p><p>“You’re really something.” Woozi flicked his tongue, shaking his head as if he’d just heard a funny joke. “Asking me for compassion when I’ve been your caregiver for most of my life.”</p><p>“Caregiver? You haven’t done shit for me,” Seungkwan retorted.</p><p>“Sure. I’ve done nothing for you. I just accompany you to all of your hospital visits, hold your hand whenever you feel a bit <em>weak</em>, went to prom with you, never kissed or dated someone I actually like, gave up on my childhood to care and worry about you because my dad wants it that way. Should I go on?”</p><p>Seungkwan gulped. Ignoring Woozi’s teary eyes, he muttered, “I’m tired. This conversation is exhausting.”</p><p>“Better go to bed before you have a heart attack,” Woozi snapped coldly and Seungkwan watched him stomp down the hallway, heading downstairs where his father awaited him.</p><p>“Asshole,” Seungkwan muttered. “You don’t deserve my pity.”</p><p>The world around him blurred and he heard the flip of a page before he found himself outside, a cold wind messing up his fringe. Annoyed, he shook his head, but it seemed to make his messy fringe-situation even worse.</p><p>“Let me help you,” a female voice said from his left, and gentle fingers grazed his forehead. Seungkwan blinked and looked into Yeri’s smiling face, the tip of her nose a soft red. “Perfect,” she told him, patting his head. “You look cute.”</p><p>“I’m not cute,” he heard himself protest and that was when he realized he wasn’t being himself; he was controlled by the writer again and this was a <em>stage</em>. Yeri took his hand and pulled him forward.</p><p><em>Wait,</em> Seungkwan thought but it was already too late. His feet had already left the sidewalk and he was following Yeri on the street. He felt his heartbeat speed up. <em>I can’t die. I can’t. I need more time, just a bit more time to find a solution. Please–</em></p><p>He looked to his side, seeing a car in the distance, heading straight at them. He tried to force his body to move like he wanted, frantic, barely able to think. <em>Stop walking, go back, or r u n, please.</em></p><p>A tear dropped to his cheek and he closed his eyes, feeling his feet advance closer to the center of the street. Then, a shadow thundered over him, and Seungkwan was pulled into a tight embrace. His face collided with the soft fabric of a school uniform and when he raised his head, he looked into a familiar set of brown eyes.</p><p>As he gazed up at his savior, he felt a rush of air of the car just passing by, missing Seungkwan by a few centimeters. He looked over his shoulder and saw Yeri and Wonwoo standing on the other side of the street, both blushing and lost in their own little world.</p><p>A frenzied part of Seungkwan’s brain realized he was still alive. “You. . .” he said, turning around to gaze at the brown-eyed boy once more.</p><p>The boy gave him a flat stare.</p><p>Seungkwan thought he was going to break out in tears. A certain hotness flooded his bloodstream, and he felt a range of emotions: relief, glee, surprise, confusion, thankfulness. And there was this stillness in his heart too, the same stillness he had felt the first time he’d looked into those brown eyes back at the football field.</p><p>“You have beautiful eyes, you know.”</p><p>The boy let him go, taking a few steps back. He was still gazing at Seungkwan but he seemed rather overwhelmed right now. Blushing, Seungkwan looked over at Yeri and Wonwoo.</p><p>“We don’t have much time left,” he said. He took the boy’s hand, held onto those slender fingers with his own, tip-toeing slightly to look a bit closer at those brown eyes. “What’s your name?”</p><p>The boy frowned. He slowly shook his head, dragging a thumb over Seungkwan’s hand. He seemed so confused and disorientated that Seungkwan felt bad for him. He wanted to help the boy; it was as if he knew him, as if Seungkwan could help him, and only he. This thought almost made Seungkwan laugh because wasn't he the one that had been saved? </p><p>“You changed my faith,” Seungkwan said, a smile tugging at his lips. He felt an old tenderness toward the boy, like what he remembered of love when he was little.</p><p>“I’m Seungkwan. Boo Seungkwan.”</p><p>The boy’s eyes lit up, but the moment was gone as fast as it had come.<em> Not know</em>, Seungkwan whined inwardly before he watched the world around him blur and slowly disappear into thin air.</p><p>Hearing the familiar noise, he wasn’t surprised to find himself sitting in a classroom a moment later, with the boy nowhere to be seen. It was an art lesson, Seungkwan quickly realized. A half-drawn Woozi grinned at him from the canvas that stood before him.</p><p>“Yeah, I’m not drawing that,” Seungkwan declared, enraged at his <em>stage self </em>and even more at the writer who forced him to run after Woozi.</p><p>“Are you having trouble, Kwannie?” Dokyeom asked, curiously looking up from his own canvas.</p><p>“It’s nothing,” Seungkwan retorted, picking up his brush. “I’ll redo it.” Dokyeom watched him as he angrily drew over Woozi’s face with black paint, until the whole canvas was covered with it.</p><p>“What are we even supposed to draw?”</p><p>“The person whom we’re in love with.”</p><p>Seungkwan laughed. “Sure, what a normal thing of an art teacher to ask.” <em>Not like something that could only happen in a webtoon.</em> He gazed towards where Mingyu was sitting, taking notice of his canvas: He was drawing Yeri.</p><p>“Great,” Seungkwan muttered under his breath. He curled his lip at the obvious signs that this whole world existed just for those two.</p><p>“Are you okay, Seungkwan? Should I text Woozi?” Dokyeom asked, apparently seriously worried about his best friend. Seungkwan almost laughed at his distressed expression.</p><p>“Relax, Dokyeom. I’m all good.”</p><p>He cleaned his brush, debating what he should draw next, ignoring Dokyeom who had gone back to drawing but was still anxiously glancing at him from time to time.</p><p>“Aren’t you going to draw Woozi?”</p><p>Seungkwan shook his head, feeling inspired. “Nope.”</p><p>At the end of the lesson, Dokyeom leaned close, scanning Seungkwan’s canvas. “What’s that?” he muttered, pointing at the yellow thing at the center of Seungkwan’s painting.</p><p>“A star,” Seungkwan said, smiling softly at his creation. He wasn’t going to let himself get jerked around for the sake of someone else’s story. There might be someone at school who could help him change his fate, and he would find him. “<em>My </em>star.”</p>
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